Thursday, September 30, 2010

What Was I Thinking?

I just have to put this out there...why did I ever think it was hard to have an infant the first time around? This may piss off those of you with one child and it probably would have pissed me off before I had my second baby. But really...why did I ever think it was all that hard? Babies are easy for the most part. The hardest part is the sleep deprivation. The first time around, the adage of "sleep when the baby sleeps" can hold true. I wasn't going back to work and I didn't really have that much to clean or do so I really could sleep when the baby slept. I will admit that at first it is a really hard transition from having no kids to having one baby. You can't eat, sleep, go to the bathroom, go out, ect when you want to. However, you still can sleep, eat, and go to the bathroom at some point. Now that I have two, I am finding that exceedingly difficult. I can no longer "sleep when the baby sleeps" because while the baby sleeps, my two year old is up and playing. I think the sleep deprivation is really getting to me. For example, I got about 3 hours of sleep last night. That wouldn't be so bad if I knew I could take a nap at some point today. But I know I most likely can't. Because if Peanut decides that today she actually wants to nap, my little Pumpkin will inevitably be awake. Or vice versa. It is so daunting to wake up in the morning after what seems like nothing more than a cat nap and know the feeling of tiredness will not go away the whole day or night and that the next night will be the same story. Yes I know that this is what you get when you have kids. I get it. I know that I will never feel rested ever again, or at least until my kids are in college. And I am sure that those of you with more than two kids or twins are just laughing at me. I know the me with three kids will laugh at the me with two kids, but I am just so damn tired!!! It will get better, I know. As soon as Pumpkin decides to sleep through the night I will feel like a human being again. But as I told my husband the other day, right now I feel like some sort of disgusting, lactating, hermit zombie.

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